Friday, October 30, 2009

Man Displays Real Corpse as Halloween Decoration

Man Displays Real Corpse as Halloween Decoration

Authorities in Fresh Kills, New York are confirming an investigation of a local resident who apparently had displayed a real human corpse on his front porch for two weeks as part of his Halloween "Fright Scene". Mort Icann 37, an employee of Acme Body and Cadaver, had been taken into custody late Tuesday night by police after being reported by an observant teenager. Justin Thyme made the 911 call after approaching the Icann porch and noticing that something just "didn't smell right. I was canvasing the neighborhood to earn a badge toward Eagle Scout. We've got two objectives: one, we help residents with their knots, you know- if a slip knot is incorrect we'll fix it. Two, we've been getting a lot of instruction from the den leaders on how to recognize pedophiles and so we're out knocking on doors so we can identify people and hopefully make the neighborhood a lot safer. Anyways, I went to knock at 1313 Mockingbird Lane and I just had a feeling about it, so I called the police."

Icann's "Fright Scene" had an assortment of ghouls, human victims, and blood and gore soaked medical instruments. Strangely there were no pumpkins, black cats, or spider webs decorating his yard. Amy Sweet, 7, says she and her friends play up and down the street regularly and that residence didn't seem out of the ordinary. " There's all kinds of neat decorations up: dismemberments, amputations, car crash victims, torture scenes, and his actually wasn't that scary. I thought the guy laying down on the porch swing was pretty lame, just real pale and it had no dripping blood. His eyes were even closed."

Police said Mr. Icann had confessed that in these tough economic times he had just decided to bring his work home with him and decorate on the cheap. "I really thought I had put enough formaldehyde on it so it wouldn't be a problem. I also don't think its that big a deal, I mean, these kids see this kind of stuff all day long on prime time TV."

Melissa Sweet, 8, confirmed "Naw, it didn't bother us at all to have a dead guy hanging out in our neighborhood. What bothered us is only being able to go through the 2nd Baptist Church House of Terror twice. Did you know they do a double heart transplant? Without anesthesia? Between a Muslim and a Christian? And the kids pick which one dies?"

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